When Elmo takes over and mommy fights back!

The character in this story is my son, who was 3 years old. He is now 16 years old and full of wisdom and knowledge. Thanks to me and cable TV, the internet and Family Guy, he is filled with good morals, values and he has finally understanding the meaning of respecting your elders. However, there was one parenting skill I could not master, which was the how not to embarrass mommy in public skill. Now don’t get me wrong, as he transitioned from toddler to middle adult, it was an adventure. He was very out spoken and curious about everything. He loved TV and some character named Elmo.

My son, 3 going on 30, just knew when he was among other human being, beside mommy, and would release his inner beast. He would roar in dissatisfaction when mommy refused to feed his obsession with the red puppet (I refuse to say the puppet’s name, I just can’t do it. OK…ok, its El…mo…ok I did it!) He loved him some Elmo. Everything was about Elmo, his room, bed spread, videos, bath towel and out of the blue, one day he just stop calling me mommy and re- named me Elmo! I was now Elmo. Some how, I was now a red furry character named mommy Elmo (I look nothing liked Elmo, was it my red lip gloss?). Mommy and baby time was cut short everyday, as soon as we entered the house from a day at the park or the library, he would climb the steps into his room, and stands next to the TV with his hand on his hip; tapping his feet and like an old man with no teeth he would say, “Elmo Please”. Like his servant, I walked over to the TV and press play, no question asked! But something terrible happened that ended the obsession with Elmo. One horrible event took place in the house where Elmo’s voice and laughter was once heard louder then lightening, was gone for good!

Times were hard and (even harder now) some times; mommy had to make a choice between the cable bill and light bill. So I had to make a decision between two bills. Without electricity there would be no warm meals, fresh meat and cold drinks. Without cable, well back to regular TV (if you have an antenna) and NO MORE ELMO!!!. Well that was an easy decision, yeah right! One Morning, little man woke up and he knew something was wrong because the roaring, hyperventilation, drooling and the passing of gas all came at once. I was not prepared physical and mental for this type of Elmo withdrawal. I tried everything to calm him down, I became the Elmo substitute, I walk, talk and began singing like Elmo, only to have a dirty diaper thrown at me. I finally calmed my son down and explained what happen in baby language. “When Mommy doesn’t pay the cable bill, the TV turns off and we can’t watch our favorite TV shows”. He just stared at me and I stared back and smiled. He did not understanding nothing about a cable bill not being paid. He just wanted to see that Red doll, jumping up and down the TV screen singing “La La La,… I like my gold fish and crayon too”. My baby became weak and fragile; something was missing in his imaginary world. So one day, I decided to take a trip to the museum. We took the bus and like I said when he is out in public, he turns into someone who never seen sun light and talks to everything insight!

On the bus, I was facing forward and my baby was position on both knees, holding on to the handle on the seats. He immediately started a conversation with a nice lady who sat in the back of us. Every now and then I would glance at the lady and my baby with a smile; she returned the friendly invite. The conversation some how converted to TV. The nice lady ask my little man about his favorite TV show, I started to feel a little warm, because I just knew were this conversation was heading…Elmo! The more she talked and ask him questions about TV, the hotter it became on the bus and his voice was transforming into something out of a monster movies. Then it happened, the nice lady asked, “What is your favorite cartoon?” My little man replied in his high Elmo pitched voice, so the bus driver and everyone in the back of the bus, the side of the bus and the corner of the bus can hear him say “I love Elmo but, my mommy did not pay the cable bill, she took Elmo, no more Elmo”. (Wow, know I was wanted for taking Elmo). I was soaking in sweat, so to play it off, I glance at the nice lady with a smile but, this time she did not smile back. She gave me, the lady you need to pay the cable bill, look! I was so embarrass but, kept my composer and look straight ahead, I had a stern look on my face and a weak smile. My baby sat there and acted like nothing happened, so innocent! Mean while I’m screaming in my head, OMG! This little rug rat, did it again…God why! I cried in my head. Our stop had arrived, he waved good buy to his new friend and I did not look back! He jumped off the bus and both feet landing on the ground, already searching and pointing at everything in sight!

Well that was the end of the Elmo obsession and the end of my embarrassed mommy moments!

The End